Taming the What-Ifs: How Mindfulness Calms an Anxious Mind

Have you ever thought about what it would be like to survive a zombie apocalypse?

How about contemplating your chances of being struck by lightning? Do these “what if” types of thoughts swim around in your mind? If so, you could be experiencing Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD). In this blog, we will explore this form of anxiety and how mindfulness can help. I’m sharing my story to offer encouragement and compassion to those struggling with anxiety.

The Dreaded What-Ifs

Like many people, I’m not a fan of anything medically related, especially involving needles or blood. So there I was, waiting in the room for the nurse to administer my annual flu shot. My mind was creating all sorts of “what if” scenarios. I even started pre-determining which nurse I thought would be the kinder person versus the “stabber.” Of course—just my luck—I ended up getting the nurse I had assumed would take the day's anger out on my poor, innocent arm.

To my surprise, she was so gentle I barely felt anything. I confided in her about my anxiety, and she was incredibly compassionate. She even shared how, back in nursing school, they had to practice administering vaccines on oranges—and how queasy she would get, almost passing out each time. Who knew?

The point of this story is: even people who appear brave have their moments of anxiety. GAD can cause your mind to play tricks on you, just as it did for me. Let’s take a closer look at this form of anxiety.

What is Generalized Anxiety Disorder?

GAD is a form of anxiety that causes the mind to worry about scenarios that are highly unlikely to occur. These worries often center around multiple areas of life, including work, family, friendships, hobbies, interests, and health. They create a sense of fear and uncertainty, and we become consumed with the idea of making the wrong decision.

Often, as shown in my example above, our brain tends to focus on the “worst-case scenario” in everyday situations. The mind is so powerful it can convince us we’re in danger—even when there’s no evidence. You could be enjoying a beautiful walk, and suddenly your GAD brain reminds you of every scary thing that could happen. Thanks, GAD—we were having a good day until you showed up!

Our bodies respond with symptoms of panic: racing heart, sweating, even a sense of doom. But where does this come from? Let’s look at a few possible causes of this anxiety.

Potential Causes of Generalized Anxiety Disorder

• Genetics

If we come from a family with anxious parents or caregivers, we may be more likely to develop anxiety ourselves. I always tell my clients that our parents didn’t intentionally come together to raise an anxious child—it’s more like the “luck of the draw.” That said, blaming our family background won’t help resolve GAD, but understanding it can provide insight.

• Social Learning Theory

This theory suggests we learned anxious behavior by observing others. If someone close to us is afraid of snakes, for example, we may adopt that fear as our own. On the other hand, being around someone who is comfortable with snakes may reduce our anxiety towards them. We often react based on the emotional energy around us—what we “vibe” from people and situations. What’s fascinating is that this modeling happens almost automatically. The good news? If we can learn anxious behavior, we can also unlearn it, with the right tools.

• Parenting Style

Research shows that being raised by overly protective or overly cautious parents can lead to the development of anxiety. The anxious apple doesn’t fall far from the anxious tree. Again, while understanding our upbringing can offer clarity, blaming it won’t solve the problem. Fortunately, we have a choice. We can continue following the patterns we were taught—or we can choose a different path.

Now, on to the good stuff: how mindfulness can help alleviate GAD.

How Can Mindfulness Skills Help?

You’ve probably heard the word mindfulness thrown around, but what does it mean? At its core, mindfulness is about staying in the present moment and not judging it. Sounds simple, right? It can be hard at first, but like any skill, it gets easier with practice.

The past is gone. The future is unknown. All we truly have is now. GAD—and all anxiety—pulls us away from the present. When we’re overwhelmed, bringing our attention back to the here and now can calm our minds.

By observing our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors without judgment, we become more resilient to life’s curveballs. A simple way to begin practicing mindfulness is to tune into your senses—notice what you see, hear, smell, taste, and feel. Just a few minutes each day can help those “what ifs” fade away.

One of my favorite examples of coping with GAD came from a young boy I worked with. He was in counseling because his “what-if” mind was causing him physical and emotional distress. During one mindfulness session, he imagined storing all his worries on a rocket ship and sending them to the moon. What a great idea! Of course, there are many metaphors that can help, but this one worked for him—he loved outer space.

If this resonates with you, know that you are not alone. At Like a Phoenix, our team is committed to offering compassion and support. We use evidence-based approaches tailored to your needs to help you rise from whatever challenges you’re facing.

Maria Peters, LMHC